I’m going to take a common theme and flip it on its head here. So many times we are told that offering forgiveness and grace to someone is so much harder than just holding that grudge in the pits of our soul. But what if we changed our whole perspective on forgiveness? What if we flipped the script and viewed forgiveness as a way to freedom and grudges as a prison?
Let’s be real for a minute, that is exactly what a grudge is. A grudge is something that you hold against someone that is buried deep down in your heart. When it sits there it begins to fester and morph into something worse. Your heart begins to harden and bitterness, envy, jealousy, and other emotions begin to take its place. Your relationships begin to crumble and your world gets tipped upside down. You no longer view family, friends, and peers the same way because you have this expectation that they should never wrong you or that they never will. Once you’ve been wronged in a certain way, darkness enters your heart, mind, and soul.
If we’re being honest with ourselves, then we know we have allowed ourselves to succumb to the inner evil of a heart filled with grudges. I understand that it’s hard because I’ve been there and I’ll continue to be there as long as I’m on this earth. I get it, I really do. But there’s something more to it than this.
When you hold a grudge against someone (maybe it’s someone you care about) you are literally locking yourself in a prison and throwing the key away. You’re allowing yourself to live in a darkness that you were never meant to live in. How can you ever expect to get out of the black hole you are living in if you never offer anyone forgiveness? Holding a grudge isn’t easy. Holding a grudge makes our lives ten times more difficult and it allows us to have unnecessary hurt in our heart.
So then that’s it right there. A grudge is difficult and it locks you in the cell, but there is a key that brings freedom and unlocks you from the dark hinges of this slavery. The key has a title and it’s name is forgiveness. Forgiveness frees us from the slavery of holding grudges. Forgiveness unlocks our inner potential to the way we look at this incredible world we live in. Forgiveness brings us freedom to be who we were meant to be.
Forgiveness allows us to be independent from a certain way of thinking and from other people’s choices. Next time someone wrongs or even if they continue to wrong you, we all have a choice to make. We can lock up things in our heart and be a slave to them, or we can offer unconditional mercy on this person. Forgiveness allows us to take the initiative over a situation. We no longer have to wait for the other person to apologize, we can just move on. Now one thing I’m not advocating for is continuing relationships that are abusive or friendships that are one sided. There must be some mutual ground. Forgiveness can go hand and hand with discontinuing relationships. Just because you end something does not mean that grace cannot be used. But surely, it brings light.
On a side note, I am no where near perfect, you are no where near perfect, and your peers are no where near perfect. Don’t lie, you have purposely wronged someone out of spite and you know it is true. So at the end of the day, haven’t we all screwed up? Haven’t we all taken it a little too far? I know I have. Let’s unlock ourselves from the chains that are holding us down. I choose forgiveness over grudges and I hope you join me too.
“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.
*Featured Photo via GoogleImages